Love Is Calling

Wishing you love and happiness, and above all, PEACE, this Christmas.  We so need it in this world...

Let's Call It A Year

LET'S CALL IT A YEAR

http://soundcloud.com/kmbrco/letscallitayear

words by Kimberly Mackowski, music by Beth Sablay

Maybe it’s just me, but when the ball dropped and 2011 arrived, I bid 2010 a very hearty farewell.  2010 had been a very difficult year, particularly with the loss of my mother.  I missed her dearly, and miss her every day.  But, somehow, I felt that beginning a new year might change things. A fresh start. Yes, I would still miss her, but we were moving forward. My sisters, my family, had weathered the storm, and we were all still here, forging new memories and remembering old ones.

Somehow, though, 2011 didn’t go as well as I’d hoped. It was difficult in other ways. And I know many who were challenged this year. Who suffered loss, difficult changes, heartbreak, loneliness. Who said goodbye to loved ones far too soon. And it seems, every day, we hear of some tragedy taking place.  People losing their jobs, their homes, their health. Sometimes it seems as if the entire world is set to self-destruct.

And then the holidays circle around again. First, it seems as if it starts too early. Stores put up Christmas displays in October. Christmas music starts playing before Thanksgiving. We grouse. Complain about the commercialism, while we rush around shopping for gifts, and writing out Christmas cards. But there is something about the season, even with all the commercial trappings, that makes it different from the rest of the year.  It’s as if we’re trying to conjure up all the generosity and kindness we fell short of in the past eleven months. The clock is ticking and we’ve got to fit as much in as possible before the year ends.

And what’s wrong with that? Really. What’s wrong with being a little kinder? Offering a hand to someone in need? Sharing a smile, a happy greeting, being just a little nicer to those we love, and those we meet along the way. I only wish it would last longer. The cheer and forgiveness, the gestures of kindness, letting those we love know just how much we do love them.

When 2011 exits, I will not be sorry to see it go. And yet, each day of December, I’m aware that the holiday season surrounds me and I long for a moment to just be still and enjoy it. To take in the beauty of a twinkling Christmas tree, be with the ones I love, and to listen to the music of the season.

The songs say it all. All we have to do is listen.

Wishing you the happiest of holidays. And blessings of love and hope for the coming year.

Kimberly

I can't make you love me

First off, I apologize. It's been a long time since I've written a true post. I've wanted to, but other things take priority.  And, really, who wants to hear what I have to say. Especially in the middle of the night.

I've been working on my Etsy site, posting new items, doing a little surfing, and thinking, and reading.
I hit "play" on the laptop of  Bon Iver's cover of Bonnie Raitt's "I can't make you love me" - and it just breaks my heart.  There's just something so beautiful in the sound of his voice. So unexpected.

I had heard of Bon Iver, but never really gave them an honest listen. This cover got me to sit up and pay attention.  Check out the video on youtube.  I dare you not to be moved.

What better time to cry than in the middle of the night? It's quiet. Who are you going to talk to? Just hit repeat on the one track that lets the tears flow right now and get on with it.

Why am I sad?  Everything. Nothing. This and that.
I miss my mother. Some days I get wrapped up in fear and anxiety.
Some days I can't remember what I forgot to remember to forget.
Some days the hormones win.

What I do know is that I'm probably not really alone. Somewhere out there, in the dark of night, down the block, or half the world away, someone else is hitting repeat on "I can't make you love me", and they are letting the tears fall.

Things are often clearer after the rain...

Widget loves Texter....Parakeet Love

A sweet little video of  Widget preening her love, Texter.  Then Texter returning the gesture in kind. It's the subtle little moments inbetween that really speak of love. 

Finding Sorrow a Home

You wanted your ashes scattered

Over a river far away

We crossed the miles

We took you there

We honored your wishes

Set the dust of your body and soul free

Felt it fall through our fingers

And into the water

Watched it float away

But now, where do we go

Where is our touchstone

How do we find you

To grieve, to cry,

To wonder aloud in a quiet place

Where you are and how you are

Where do we go

To express the depths of our pain

Or share the details of our lives

Where do we go to find you

When we have no place on solid ground

No grave, no marker

No place to give our sorrow a home



The Birdies Go To Bed

The nightly ritual of tucking the birdies into bed. It begins with Tori, and then, one by one, I either tuck them in, or they fly or climb in themselves.

I captured it one night. Enjoy.

Birds at Play

http://youtu.be/58spj0sBfyk

Lots of blog post ideas floating around in my head, but not the right time to sit down and compose.
Hope you'll enjoy this instead.

Kimberly